Truehome Rave Reviews

Carolyn

Carolyn was a busy advertising executive and professional events manager seeking to build a new home that catered to her tastes and lifestyle. Through her experience with Truehome, Carolyn discovered how some issues from her childhood had greatly affected her feelings and goals for her ideal home, and indeed, her decisions about her life.

Carolyn's father's alcoholism often turned family gatherings around the dinner table into unpleasant experiences. As a child, she deeply resented this intrusion into what was in many ways a pleasant family life and she felt that she had no control over the situation.

Carolyn learned through the Truehome exercises that she had carried forward into her adult life an adaptive strategy that was an unconscious response to the situation. She had become a social butterfly, a polished hostess who put enormous energy into entertaining and creating pleasant social occasions for family and friends. She was essentially trying to control, in her adult life, what she had been unable to control as a child.

As a result, Carolyn's Truehome was designed for entertaining, which not only fit her lifestyle but also allowed her to feel relaxed and in control of her environment.

Carolyn was raised on the West Coast and had happy memories of her years in California. She was also an extensive traveler who had fond attachments to her experiences in Italy, particularly the relaxed social life that revolved around shared meals. She learned through the Truehome process that she associated those positive experiences with both Italian architecture and local Arts and Crafts architecture. As an adult, she subconsciously saw both as models for the type of dining experiences she had missed as a child.

As a result, Carolyn's Truehome contained architectural elements which reminded her of both California and Italy. This not only suited her conscious aesthetic preferences as an adult, but created a firm foundation for her emotional health.

Mr. and Mrs. Baker

In the process of designing a new home, Mr. and Mrs. Baker were at loggerheads because Mr. Baker had become very attached to a particular design solution that involved a basement.

The building site was on the side of a hill and he wanted the first floor to be partially below grade. Mrs. Baker emphatically disliked this plan. They found themselves at a standstill, unable to resolve their conflict. He thought she was being unreasonable, and she thought he was being stubborn.

Then, through the exercises in Truehome, it became apparent that Mrs. Baker had actually suffered a serious childhood trauma which she associated with enclosed spaces. Her association was so strong that she could not enter any enclosed area without feeling intense anxiety. Her current home had a walk-in closet, and she literally dashed into it to get her clothes while holding her breath, and ran out as soon as she could collect her things. Despite this fact, neither of them had realized she suffered from claustrophobia.

 Mr. and Mrs. Baker created a Truehome without walk-in closets or other enclosed spaces, including her husband's fantasy basement. What it had instead was an expansive back porch that reminded Mr. Baker of loving times with his mother when he was growing up, lots of windows open to the sky so he could see the stars, and architectural cues throughout that Mrs. Baker associated with being safe and secure.

Thanks to Truehome, Mr. and Mrs. Baker were better able to understand each other's needs. They were able to create a home that inspired them and nurtured their marriage.

Anita: Self-Care Breakthrough

Anita was responsible for the care of her disabled husband, who was unable to communicate due to a stroke.

During the design phase of their new home, Anita was completely focused on creating a home that met his needs, while ignoring her own. As a result nothing about the home design was hers.

Through the Truehome process, Anita realized that her parents' attitudes of martyrdom and condemnation of selfish behaviors had been instilled in her. Consequently, as an adult, she was unable to make her own wellbeing a priority. Truehome helped her to recognize this pattern. As a result, Anita was finally able to work with her design team to create a home that met both her needs and her husband's, nurturing them both.

Mr. and Mrs. Smith

Mr. and Mrs. Smith had hired an architecture firm to build their dream home. However, Mr. Smith had strong aversions to any design element of the home or grounds that might possibly involve maintenance.

His aversion was so extreme that he planned to cut down a beautiful grove of pecan trees on the property because the trees periodically lost limbs.

Through the Truehome process, it became clear that Mr. Smith's strong reaction to anything requiring maintenance stemmed from attitudes projected by his mother about how a "good and productive man" cared for his property.

Not only had Mr. Smith internalized an aversion to doing household maintenance, he felt inadequate and insecure about it when maintenance chores needed to be done. He couldn’t relax and feel comfortable in his home for fear that something would require his attention.

Learning this information about Mr. Smith was an eye-opening experience for both him and his wife. The new home was moved to a site away from the grove, and the pecan trees were saved. It did wonders for their relationship. The Truehome they built was designed to be very low maintenance.